I’ve been thinking a lot about you guys during this second lock down. Wondering what you’re all up to, wondering if you’re using any of the things you’ve learnt at camp, if you’re spending time with people you met there or even just chatting online, supporting and encouraging each other. Some of your stories have stuck in my head like the confidence crisis that you were having Angela, or that you didn’t like hacking out on your own Beth. Knowing that camp went some way towards helping you through these obstacles makes me so happy. I’m sure most of us have experienced the joy of helping someone else out when they can, for me, it’s so rewarding, I actively seek ways to do it on a regular basis. Why? Because other people have helped me though some very dark and difficult times and I want to pay it forward. If you can help someone why wouldn’t you? A wonderful lady, in fact magical is a better word to describe her once gave me some advice. She said don’t give your power away to anyone else. I had no idea what she meant. But at the time I was very unhappy and I felt that someone else was responsible for my happiness and that he had taken that away. I wasn’t first in the queue when they were handing out the brains! I am a thinker and a problem solver, but I don’t do cryptic! So it took me a while and then one day I found this on the internet and I finally understood what this beautiful lady was trying to say to me. So I did as I was told and I started taking back my power, making my own happiness and living again. He wasn’t responsible for my happiness, I was! And as hard as it was to make sense of it at the time, I had allowed him to take mine away. I had a choice, we all have a choice, every single minute of every day, as to how we respond to the events that unfold before us. So this blog is to all of you who took back your power. Kelly, your fear was trying to take over until slowly but surely you got hold of that fear and you kicked right up the backside and told it where to go! Now you’re achieving your goal of doing a dressage test. Wow! Just wow! Gina, well I’ve known you a while now and the change I’ve seen in you this year is massive, you now know you only need to be you and do things your way and that’s good enough. Angela and Sam – what if you’d never got back on? Look at all the fun you had because you did! All the power is now back in your hands. So proud of you both! Anxiety is much misunderstood these days and unfortunately, it’s like a weed. It you plant it, feed it regularly, sit back and watch it grow, suddenly it turns into Rapunzel’s forest! Not even your handsome prince of a pony can fight his way through to you. I have a couple who would happily eat their way through but not to come and rescue me from my tower of anxiety sadly, unless I had more food of course! Now if you take that anxiety and say ok, I understand that you’d like to take over, but actually, this is my life and I’m in control, not you, then you start to see it shrink back. And in the distance you might notice there is a fence, you can’t see to the other side of it but you know that it is obscuring something that you want. And you want it badly! So you take some steps towards it, beating that anxiety weed back, refusing to let it take over. Occasionally it gets the better of you and you sit and watch it grow, maybe even flower, perhaps you water it some, but then the fence starts to loom again. You have to cut that weed back so that you can see the fence more clearly again and with greater determination you set off towards it. What do you think lies behind that fence? Sometimes, as you get closer to it, you actually become suspicious of what’s on the other side. What if there is nothing? What if I’ve tried to get there for all this time but nothing changes? And what I get to the other side of the fence and it’s amazing, but then OMG, I have no more excuses and I have to go and do what I have been telling everyone I’m going to do for months? You toy with idea for a while, but then desire takes over again and you’re out tackling those weeds again. May be an encouraging word from a friend helped or some bossy big mouth who runs these mad camps calls you out on the rubbish you tell yourself? Or maybe you just decided that enough is enough and suddenly you find yourself there, on the other side. How did it feel? The moment you got back from that first solo ride? Did you feel the freedom of being able to ride whenever you want to? Did that hit you? The sense of achievement? Maybe there was a realisation that this was all way worse in your head than the reality? But how good does it feel to know that you can kick that weedy anxiety into touch and tell it that YOU are in control of your future, of your happiness of everything you want to achieve in life? You see you can create your own reality, you can decide how you’re going to live your life. Don’t believe me? Who made you go to camp? Who made you go on that first solo ride? Who made you get on your horse when you were adamant that you weren’t going to because some crazy lady had swapped the instructors around, Sam? It wasn’t your best mate. Unless she had a hoist and a bit of rope up her sleeve to attach you to it. It wasn’t your horse who tacked himself up and said, ‘Right, we’re off down the road on our own, ok?’ It wasn’t your friend who convinced you to give it a go, unless she kidnapped you, bundled you and your horse in to her trailer and drove you to camp at gunpoint!! It was YOU! You beat back those weeds, you met that fence head on and you jumped! And look what you found on the otherside… Don’t let anything take your power away from you lovely people. You’ve so totally got this inside of you. You love your horses. Being a horse rider is part of who you are, part of your identity. Own it and be proud. This is your life, you get to choose. If you don’t, someone else will. I don’t see any hoists or revolvers around here so I think we can safely say that you’re free to go and create the reality that you want. If you’re not sure how to make that happen, let me know and I’ll share some stories that might help you. But only if you ask. I’m not going to expose all of my secrets otherwise, I’ll just stay on the weedy side of the fence waiting for a leg up!
4 Comments
Della ashman
10/11/2020 06:32:57 am
Really needed this today and makes so.much sense ! Thankyou I'm ready to face the day 😍😍
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Claire Harper
10/11/2020 07:14:10 am
That was really powerful! I suffer with anxiety and unfortunately the weeds have taken over during times in my life but I have had a lot of support from family, friends and my horses to help me cut them down. This blog is really helping me think a different way. Thank you for sharing this Lorraine 🥰
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Karen Salisbury
10/11/2020 08:39:13 am
Well ,you certainly walk your talk Lorraine. Really inspiring message , needed this reminder,thank u for taking the time to care . You would think that I have cleared that forest by now ,but each time it grows back albeit less think and dense thanks to people like you xxx
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Kelly
13/11/2020 10:20:57 pm
What a lovely blog! I’ve read this twice! To remind me that I can over come the fear to achieve my goals! It’s so difficult at the moment in lockdown as no competitions! But going to stay positive and still get back out there when we can! Stay safe x
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AuthorHey Folks, I'm Lorraine and the picture is of one of my horses Tara - in our office! I really am the luckiest person alive to get to do what I do. Archives
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