WTF just happened? And why am I happier than ever?

WTF just happened? And why am I happier than ever?It’s hard to say where everything started to make me think that changes were afoot, let’s face it, the world has been in a bit of turmoil since Covid, but actually, things worked out ok until 2022. August 2022 to be exact and nothing I can attribute to the pandemic. However, January 2023 found me writing a business plan, the first words of which were ‘I feel that within the next five years, we will be losing our current venue for camps…’ As it turned out, it was 5 months later when I received that news. They say that life begins at the end of your comfort zone, well I’ve been out of mine since May and life could not be better.
Now whilst devastated I was also dealing with an injury that I was, at the time, unaware it would change the course of my life. It’s funny how when you need to learn something or listen, things will come up to remind you again and again. Sometimes the messages are subtle and easy to ignore. Sometimes they hit you like a 600lb race horse crossing the finish line and leave you flat on the floor, dazed, confused and reeling.
The second half of 2022 was like that. I lost my mare. I had a major falling out with a good friend and a couple of minor ones too! I was betrayed by someone whom I trusted, whom I’d given a lot of time and energy to, which led to the destruction of one of my businesses. And then I hurt myself, (same leg that I was then to damage in May) getting off a horse. All of these messages were telling me to get out of the situation I was in.
You see I’d got a little complacent.
My life was perfect in so many ways and then at the beginning of ‘23 I decided I needed to increase my income because there was never any money left over to put towards the future. I can earn money, but I can also spend it too. With 10 horses, it’s not hard! I laid down a plan to double the amount of people I could be of service to and instead of everything getting better, I then had an accident whilst I was getting on one of my horses. Seven months on, my leg is still not working properly. All three of my businesses have collapsed and I have no income.
Yet I am happier than I have ever been.
You see, at the time I couldn’t see it, but now I know that I needed to recalibrate. I needed to STOP. All of my life, I’ve been on a treadmill. I’m a workaholic and just need to do more, work more, sleep less, keep running faster and faster towards the end goal! But being confined to my bed for eight weeks, unable to walk or drive, I realised that although I had achieved some pretty amazing things, I was getting nowhere. And as all my businesses failed I started to see how actually, for me to be able chase this big goal, to become the highest version of myself possible, old patterns had to be broken.
The truth was, it was impossible to increase the amount of people I could help whilst running camps from Chyverton, or helping people with their problem horses or sharing my horses with other people through the Riding Pool. Every business had a finite number because there were only so many people we could have on camp and only so many dates we could use. The place stood empty all winter and it drove me mad because I could see the potential of what we could do - but it wasn’t mine to do it with. And teaching one-to-one is great, until you can’t walk, never mind handle a problem horse! And the Riding Pool? Well, there are only so many horses I can keep for other people to share and when that business is destroyed, you’re left with horses that you know you will never part with but no income to keep them. Great lifestyle business but a million miles away from the life plan I started to formulate at the age of seven.
I’ve heard many people say that they don’t know what their purpose is or how to find it. I can help you with that, because I am a serial purpose finder. My overarching life’s purpose is to help others, horses & humans mainly and in that order. But it’s also to facilitate connection and learning.
Apparently, I have ADHD and dyslexia. Both of these things, if I chose to accept the labels, I consider to be superpowers. My mind is constantly problem-solving, coming up with ideas and making them happen. I have a lot of energy and an ability to juggle all kinds of things at once, focus for hours, learn quickly and find ways to achieve anything I want to. IF I apply it.
Somewhere, around year five of running camps, I forgot to apply it. Losing Bicton as a venue wasn’t great. During the pandemic I went into survival mode because we were just grateful to keep going. Developing the business was no longer a priority and I had Covid three times, which affected me quite badly every time.
But that was then and this is NOW! We might have no venue for 2024 - yet! But rest assured I have been working hard behind the scenes, formulating a plan, working on myself to make sure that I have all of the right tools and attitude in place, building my mind set to be stronger than ever! And I am excited for the future! So excited!
I’ve not felt this good in years and folks, I’m taking you all with me. We’re going to build this Camp Space for us all to share and in the next blog, I’m going to tell you how…